awesome;
- adjective
1. inspiring awe
This is one word I don't like to use lightly, it is far too powerful. At times I cringe when hearing used as slang. This sensation is spiritual. This word is one I use when something truly touches my soul.
Tonight I had an experience that helped me remember why. An old acquaintance, when faced with a challenge I have had in my life, chose a different path than I did. She chose to finish school. This is something I think about frequently. Will I go back? Why would I want to go back? Would I be able to succeed?
I remember sitting in a room for college orientation. A man was explaining how more than half of us in the room wouldn't receive a degree. More than half of the people in the room would fail. Sitting there unaware of how the next few months of my life would unfold, I thought, "This man has no idea who I am. He has no idea the determination that is so deeply rooted in my soul. I will not be a statistic."
When the world shattered this is what I thought of. All of my life I have fought to be the best I could. I have fought to be the the exception to the stereotype. I fought to be the silver lining. At that moment in time the stain glass window of my life that I had meticulously crafted and designed shattered. At that moment there was no broom. There was no dustpan. There was no glue strong enough. There were just pieces of broken plans, beautiful colorful plans that promised happiness and stability. Time passed, and those who were able to help me see the
silver lining through the rainbow of broken shards helped me look up. When I looked I saw a path that I never had seen before. My stain glass window has rebuilt itself into something more beautiful than I ever could have designed or planned and is sleeping in the crib next to me. This window is my guiding light. He is my hope. He is why I wake up in the morning. He is why my life makes sense. He is why I strive to be better.
Tonight I feel like throwing on a sweater, drinking my coffee, and picking up my paint set. Something I haven't done in some time. I feel closer to my dreams of being a great mom and wife, an educated colleague, and the woman I am supposed to be.
Soulfully signed,
the grateful statistic
SHE IS AMAZING
1 week ago


